New Apartment... Take 1

Sleep is good.

I got 10 hours of sleep last night and I'm feeling much better like my body is adjusting pretty well to the new time zone. Lots of others were up very early. Sat through lectures this morning. Feels like every other orientation I've ever sat through.
Got a few more minutes before another set of lectures and I think I'm going for a walk on the beach. Food is improving.

In Pohang

I've made it to Korea. After a long trip. I'm already trying new things, sea urchin was part of lunch. Not sure I'm going to do that twice... but I've learned I can try anything once if I don't know what it is first.
Been riding through the Korean country side all day. First 4 hours from Seoul to Daegu then sat around there for a while then late this afternoon hopped a second bus and came down to Pohang... tomorrow starts the real orientation. Hopefully I'll be awake and alive by then. Sleep has been lacking. Didn't get a shower till after dinner today... but it's all good. I'm enjoying it so far... I've got pictures.
Will work on all of that later when I've got access to a place to upload them.

Knowing Things

This actually starts off several months ago. JP was brining me books to read at Woofs. Assigned reading you might say. Most of them I was like ok I can see why you'd want me to read that. But there was one that I miss read the title on I thought it said three minute mediation, I was like JP I know you have been predicting a major blow out with Beth but I'm hoping I'll be gone by then, what good will that do me. He looked at me like I was nuts. It really said three minute meditation. Oops. Well I took the book and was like ok whatever. Maybe I'll read it maybe I won't. JP joked that I dropped the book like it was on fire but that I'd need it sometime soon. He was right about a month later way too much was going on and I couldn't calm down or get focused. He told me to pick it up. I did and it helped. So I've kinda learned that those books that scare me the most can sometimes be the ones I will need the most later.
About to or three weeks ago I got on a Richard Bach kick. It was part of my assigned reading for the summer. I really enjoyed Illusions so I figured go and see what else he'd written. I looked at several of his other books at the library. I picked up Bridge Across Forever and had that same feeling I'd had with the meditation book. Put it down and kept looking for things to read. Fast forward to this week, I was at Borders looking for airplane reading and it practically jumped off the shelf at me. So I bought it. I'm only a few pages in, but with everything else going on in my life. I think it might be helpful.
Meeting someone like Robin at this point in my life is a challenge. It's a test to see if I've really learned my lessons this far and if I'm ready for her. I really don't know. I do know that I'm going to be as open and honest and truthful as I can. I'm also going to do my best to communicate what I need and what is really going on with me. We've managed so far to navigate and have some real honest conversations about those key landmine conversations. We've come out of them laughing and talking so there is hope. All I know right now is, it is what it is and it will be what it will.

Ode to an old hat and New hat

In the Summer of 2001 my world shifted, actually the day was May 5th. I remember that day vividly still, but I think anyone would remember if they had a day like that in their life. Around that same time I went back to lifeguarding and needed a new hat to go with the new job and new view on life. I remember the shoping trip in Atlanta where I picked up what would become my hat for traveling, working and fun for the next seven years. I remember my then girlfriend telling me how great of a hat it was. The hat and everything about that time matched... Life is Good it said. Life was good. I was doing what I loved, I was happy with how things were going in my life, I really didn't think anything could go wrong. Around Christmas that year things weren't going so well there were problems with the relationship, there were problems at home, problems with school. But I was determined to make things work. So I got the then friend (no longer Girlfriend) the hat she wanted that was as close to mine as they still made. Little did I know that that New Years trip would implode as bad as it did. Life wasn't good for a while. I didn't know how to deal but I did. I kept thinking life would be good. Things would look up and eventually they did again.
The hat was there through it all my recovery in my heart and my experimenting that lead me to push myself again. I not only stage managed the Vagina Monologues, but made myself get over my fear of being on stage and was in them. The hat was along for the ride as I rigged and programed lighting cues, as I dealt with missing props, torn seams on leather pants, found feather boas, and fought with myself to make sure I wouldn't close my heart.
I had my hat with me when one of the directors and her child and myself drove to Columbia, SC to go see Jennifer Nettles, and Danielle Howle play. Little did I know that a new chapter in my life was being planned that day. That I would meet some of the people who would play a major part in the next chapter of my life, that day.
I spent three summers life guarding wearing that hat, then it moved to Atlanta with me. It also traveled where ever I went, scuba diving, hiking, road trips, outdoor concerts, screen on the green, festivals. It was there for all of it. It will be going to Korea with me... however, it's begun to show it's age, frayed edges, sweat stains, spots where the can of black spray paint exploded on me. It's time to retire it a bit.
Friday while I was out buying a new pair of sneakers (since my feet are so huge that I wouldn't be able to buy shoes in Korea). I found a new Life is Good hat. This one says Half Full. That fits me better now. It also fit me perfectly the first time I put it on... no break in time required. It's time for a new section in the book of my life. So maybe it's time for a new old faithful hat. I'm looking at things optimistically now. It wouldn't be all good but it's always got some good in it. I'm going to go do what I love while getting paid for it. I'm going to go see the world and experience new things. While I may be putting off something else that is good that has come into my life recently. It's worth it. I feel that things are going to work out how they are supposed to this time. I know and I trust what is happening. I may be leaving in a week, but it's all good. To find someone who I can tell cares about me enough to know that I have to go and yet has figured out a way to be honest with me about how she feels is truly a gift. I also feel very blessed to have her in my life in whatever form it takes. I know I'm lucky.

T-11 days and recap of the last week or so...

Finally home from the trip to Florida. I was ready to be back at my parents place here in Evans. It's been a long week on the road but it was good to see Family before I leave, even if it wasn't the original reason we planned for. I also got to see my nephew Dylan again... he is getting bigger and cuter every day.
I also got to spend some time with Mary which was nice. It's always good to see her and know that she's doing well. She gave me some assigned reading. I guess once a teacher always a teacher.
I've got pictures from Kennedy Space Center.... which handy hint for Teachers from Georgia and Florida, it's free if you have your teaching license with you. It was neat to finally see what I'd taught about and studied for years close up and it really does take more than 4 hours to see it all.

I've now seen where my parents are going to build their retirement home... it looks like a nice little coastal town so they should be happy there once it's built.
I'm wondering how the new school year is starting for all my old colleagues since they were back with students on Monday and I don't have to start teaching again till September.
Now I'm home and have around 11 days to pack and make sure everything is ready for Korea. I had my E2 Visa waiting for me when I got here, along with my Will and other legal documents my wonderful Lawyer said I should have in place before leaving.

Been singing this for weeks now

Take Me As I Am
Written by Jennifer Nettles, Kristian Bush
and Jeff Cohen
The radiator says 95
But I ain’t felt a drop of heat all night
Here in this motel, there’s no telling me
nothing
I come here five nights a week
To clean the toilets and change these
sheets
My name’s Maggie Durant,
baby ain’t that something
Chorus:
If you want it
Come and get it
If you want it, come and get it
but understand
You take me as I am
I know theses corners, I know
these streets
The curb-side Prophet there
yelling at me
He can save my soul for a drink
and a dollar
Yeah, he’s yelling about my tattoos
But we all live with the scars we
choose
They might hurt like hell, but
they all make us stronger
Repeat Chorus
I’m slow to trust but I’m quick
to love
I push too hard and I give too
much
I ain’t saying I’m perfect, but I
promise I’m worth it
Now I’m standing here in front
of you
Tell me boy, what you gonna do?

Strange Checklists

I'm working my way through a strange set of checklists they all relate to the same thing but I feel like my ADD has kicked in big time.
Things to do in the next couple of weeks:
1. repack luggage for Korea
2. Pack bags for Florida for Funeral and Family visit.
3. Read stack of books on Korea.
4. Spend time with Mom, Dad, Brother, Nephew, Sister in Law, Uncles, and Mary
5. Cuddle with Sassafrass, try to explain that she wouldn't like the plane ride or Kimchi.
6. Last minute visits with Augusta peeps.
7. Try for one last visit to Atlanta.
8. Sell Car/ cancel insurance.
9. Relax.
10. Work on meditating every day, not just sporadically.
11. Research and choose/ buy a web cam so I can keep up with Family.
12. Finish books for JP, Beth, etc.
13. Wrap first Birthday presents for Dylan.
14. Remember to pack Halloween costume for Dylan to go to Florida.
15. Take books back to Library.
16. Shop for basic stuff that needs to go with me... toothpaste, deodorant, Advil, etc.
17. Eat GOOD Mexican (Jody says, I wouldn't be able to find it in Korea).
18. Vet appointment for Sass so she's up to date when I leave her on shots and all.
19. Cancel cellphone once I have contract so I don't get charge early termination fee.
20. Various little things.